Inspirational Words
The Circle of Courage embodies four core values for nurturing all children in a climate of respect and dignity (Brendtro, Brokenleg, & Van Bockern, 2002). We get to create this climate in our own homes.
1. The Spirit of Belonging: The universal longing for human bonds is nurtured by relationships of trust so that the child can say, “I am loved.” 2. The Spirit of Mastery: The child’s inborn thirst for learning is nurtured; learning to cope with the world, the child can say, “I can succeed.” 3. The Spirit of Independence: The child’s free will is nurtured by increased responsibility so that the child can say, “I have power to make decisions.”
4. The Spirit of Generosity: The child’s character is nurtured by concern for others so that the child can say, “I have a purpose for my life.”
1. The Spirit of Belonging: The universal longing for human bonds is nurtured by relationships of trust so that the child can say, “I am loved.” 2. The Spirit of Mastery: The child’s inborn thirst for learning is nurtured; learning to cope with the world, the child can say, “I can succeed.” 3. The Spirit of Independence: The child’s free will is nurtured by increased responsibility so that the child can say, “I have power to make decisions.”
4. The Spirit of Generosity: The child’s character is nurtured by concern for others so that the child can say, “I have a purpose for my life.”
Amor fati (thank you for everything) is a mindset that you take on for making the best out of anything that happens. Treating each and every moment — no matter how challenging — as something to be embraced, not avoided. To not only be okay with it, but love it and be better for it. So that like oxygen to a fire, obstacles and adversity become fuel for your potential.
If you are alive there is inconvenience.
If you are alive there are challenges...
Reality has no security and that is its beauty.
Life has no security and that is its beauty.
Because there is no security, there is adventure...
If you miss adventure, you miss all.
If your life is not that of an adventurer,
of a search into the unknown,
then you are living in vain.
Osho, 1931-1990 (Adapted)
Indian Spiritual Leader
If you are alive there are challenges...
Reality has no security and that is its beauty.
Life has no security and that is its beauty.
Because there is no security, there is adventure...
If you miss adventure, you miss all.
If your life is not that of an adventurer,
of a search into the unknown,
then you are living in vain.
Osho, 1931-1990 (Adapted)
Indian Spiritual Leader
WORTH THE WAIT~~
What if... you didn't settle?
What if you took your time, invested in your own development, met your own high standards and waited for the partner who exceeded your expectations more and more each day?
What if... it was possible to have it all?
What if there was a way to see into the future and realize that someone exists who is a reflection of all the best qualities you have to offer?
What if... someone exists who is better than you thought possible?
What if Hollywood isn't a fantasy, but actually a representation of our highest potential?
What if... you felt whole on your own?
What if your heartache was healed, your identity was clear, your purpose was known and your life felt fulfilled as a single individual?
What if... you loved yourself first?
What if you attracted people effortlessly because the way you loved yourself was the way everyone wants to be loved?
What if you were so full of the kind of energy you wanted that you had an excess to give away?
What if who you chose to be in relationship with was a reflection of that same abundance of love?
What if next time you didn't settle, but chose the one who made you happier every moment you got to know more about them and instead of revealing flaws they revealed more layers they had to give?
~Graham R White
What if... you didn't settle?
What if you took your time, invested in your own development, met your own high standards and waited for the partner who exceeded your expectations more and more each day?
What if... it was possible to have it all?
What if there was a way to see into the future and realize that someone exists who is a reflection of all the best qualities you have to offer?
What if... someone exists who is better than you thought possible?
What if Hollywood isn't a fantasy, but actually a representation of our highest potential?
What if... you felt whole on your own?
What if your heartache was healed, your identity was clear, your purpose was known and your life felt fulfilled as a single individual?
What if... you loved yourself first?
What if you attracted people effortlessly because the way you loved yourself was the way everyone wants to be loved?
What if you were so full of the kind of energy you wanted that you had an excess to give away?
What if who you chose to be in relationship with was a reflection of that same abundance of love?
What if next time you didn't settle, but chose the one who made you happier every moment you got to know more about them and instead of revealing flaws they revealed more layers they had to give?
~Graham R White
Sometimes I struggle accepting who I am. Stigma, people, and culture often create an imprint that tells us what we can and can't be. I love surprising people and being surprised by learning that pictures and personalities rarely tell the whole story. I'm tough and I'm sensitive. I'm empathetic and judgmental. I'm an outdoorsman and I care about the environment. I like kale and bacon. I'm a believer and I have questions. I like everyone and sometimes don't like anyone. I'm creative and logical. I'm a mess and have it together. I'm dark and light. I'm a man's man who talks about my feelings. I am who I am and that changes and evolves with time, people, and experiences. The more we try to nail it down or package it up the further we get from our authentic selves. Sensitivity is a fundamental dimension of human personality and highly sensitive people process more sensory input and pick up on more of what’s going on in both their internal and external environment. Embracing yourself starts with knowing yourself. Not who others think you are supposed to be but who you are. Give that space and grace to breathe and grow. Life gets really good when we embrace different in ourselves and others.
- Miles Adcox
PIVOT LATELY?
“A pivot is powerful because it takes away all of your excuses. It puts you back in control of the game you’re playing. Pivoting isn’t plan B; it’s a part of the process. Unexpected things will happen; setbacks do occur. Whether or not you’re prepared to pivot will affect how well you weather those storms and find a way to survive.
We often look at successful people, hearing their stories of failure, and think that they succeeded despite the fact that they failed but that’s not true. Successful people and organizations don’t succeed in spite of failure. They succeed because of it. ...
The world can be cruel. It’s nobody’s responsibility to make your dream come true. Tough times will come, and what determines a person’s success during such trying times is the ability to pivot. Every calling encounters setbacks, and sometimes people don’t want what you have to offer, or maybe they just don’t understand it. Other times, life throws you a curveball or the passion you once had wanes. At times like these, we are inclined to give up, but these are the moments that require our most intentional action.”
– Jeff Goins, from The Art of Work
We often look at successful people, hearing their stories of failure, and think that they succeeded despite the fact that they failed but that’s not true. Successful people and organizations don’t succeed in spite of failure. They succeed because of it. ...
The world can be cruel. It’s nobody’s responsibility to make your dream come true. Tough times will come, and what determines a person’s success during such trying times is the ability to pivot. Every calling encounters setbacks, and sometimes people don’t want what you have to offer, or maybe they just don’t understand it. Other times, life throws you a curveball or the passion you once had wanes. At times like these, we are inclined to give up, but these are the moments that require our most intentional action.”
– Jeff Goins, from The Art of Work
The Four Keys to a Meaningful Life
A new book takes a stab at figuring out just what pursuing a meaningful life entails. In The Power of Meaning, journalist Emily Esfahani Smith draws from the texts of great writers and philosophers—Emerson, Aristotle, Buddha, and Victor Frankl, for example—as well as interviews with everyday people seeking to increase meaning in their lives, to try to distill what’s central in this pursuit. The book, though only loosely tied to research, is mostly an engaging read about how people find meaning in life through “four pillars” of meaning.
Crown, 2017, 304 pages
1. Belonging. When we are understood, recognized, and affirmed by friends, family members, partners, colleagues, and even strangers, we feel we belong to a community. Results from some studies—as well as end-of-life conversations—indicate that many people count their relationships as the most meaningful part of their lives, even when those relationships are difficult or strained.
2. Purpose. When we have long-term goals in life that reflect our values and serve the greater good, we tend to imbue our activities with more meaning. Researcher Adam Grant has found that professions focused on helping others—teachers, surgeons, clergy, and therapists—all tend to rate their jobs as more meaningful, and that people who imbue their work with purpose are more dedicated to their jobs. Having purpose has also been tied to many positive outcomes, including increased learning for students in school and better health.
3. Storytelling. When it comes to finding meaning, it helps to try to pull particularly relevant experiences in our lives into a coherent narrative that defines our identity. People who describe their lives as meaningful tend to have redemptive stories where they overcame something negative, and to emphasize growth, communion with others, and personal agency. Laura Kray and colleagues found that asking people to consider paths not taken in life and the consequences of those choices imbued experiences with more meaning.
4. Transcendence. Experiences that fill us with awe or wonder—ones in which “we feel we have risen above the everyday world to experience a higher reality,” according to Smith--can decrease our self-focus and lead us to engage in more generous, helpful behavior. It may seem counterintuitive in some ways; but the diminishment of our own self-importance can induce a sense of meaning, she says.
Actualizing the Gifts that are In Me
I will actualize that gifts that are in me today. I will be less preoccupied with who I m not and more occupied with who I am. When I spend all of my time looking outside of me or wanting what others have, I forget that I have my own special gifts. God has placed gifts within me that I am meant to develop and share. My responsibility is to come to know what my gifts are, then to cultivate and strengthen them as I share them with the world.
It is my responsibility to learn about, develop and share the gifts that God gave me
Ideals are like stars: you will not succeed in touching them with your hands, but like the seafaring man on the desert of waters, you choose them as your guides, and following them you reach your destiny. - Carl Schurz
It is my responsibility to learn about, develop and share the gifts that God gave me
Ideals are like stars: you will not succeed in touching them with your hands, but like the seafaring man on the desert of waters, you choose them as your guides, and following them you reach your destiny. - Carl Schurz
The meaning of all addictions...
"The meaning of all addictions could be defined as endeavours at controlling our life experiences with the help of external remedies," wrote the psychiatrist Thomas Hora.
"Unfortunately, all external means of improving our life experiences are double-edged swords: they are always good and bad. No external remedy improves our condition without, at the same time, making it worse."
"Unfortunately, all external means of improving our life experiences are double-edged swords: they are always good and bad. No external remedy improves our condition without, at the same time, making it worse."
Choosing the challenges that inspire you
“The notion of an inspiring challenge may seem unusual to many of us, who are used to viewing challenges in a negative way—as dangers to be avoided or pains to be minimized. After all, most people want ease without difficulty, pleasure without pain, opportunity without challenge, and fulfillment without deprivation. Most of us have the fantasy of creating a life that is all “good” and no “bad,” all positive and no negative, just as we may foolishly want marriages that are all support and no challenges, or jobs that only build our pride and never deflate it.
But the world doesn’t work that way. The inspirations that lead you to your greatest fulfillment are derived from precisely those challenges that spur you on to fill a void, answer a question, solve a problem, untangle a mystery, unveil an unknown, make order out of disorder, or meet a need. Your ability to engage in this process of growth and transformation is exactly what creates worth for others and for yourself, allowing you to lead a fulfilled and inspired life.”
Excerpt From: John F. Demartini. “The Values Factor.” iBooks. https://itun.es/us/sNjZJ.l
But the world doesn’t work that way. The inspirations that lead you to your greatest fulfillment are derived from precisely those challenges that spur you on to fill a void, answer a question, solve a problem, untangle a mystery, unveil an unknown, make order out of disorder, or meet a need. Your ability to engage in this process of growth and transformation is exactly what creates worth for others and for yourself, allowing you to lead a fulfilled and inspired life.”
Excerpt From: John F. Demartini. “The Values Factor.” iBooks. https://itun.es/us/sNjZJ.l
“Be yourself; no base imitator of another, but your best self. There is something which you can do better than another. Listen to the inward voice and bravely obey that. Do the things at which you are great, not what you were never made for.”
― Ralph Waldo Emerson
― Ralph Waldo Emerson
Stress...
...triggers the genetic potential for addiction. Chronic, inescapable, unavoidable stress is public enemy #1 in the brain of those who possess the genetic potential for addiction. This is a very good reason treatment shouldn't be punitive; treatment should involve healing and rebalancing the brain and learning to have pleasure in a natural, drug free way. Not ironically being punitive, only causes stress, hence renewed cravings and then resumption of use.
Stress that happens early and stress that is chronic and inescapable is the most harmful. Stress works directly on the midbrain, triggering the release of cortisol and corticotrophin-releasing factor (CRF), both of which are key neurological ingredients in depression and addiction.
As a non-addict, these neurochemicals and hormones will make you susceptible to premature aging and a myriad of other diseases. For an addict, in addition to all of that, elevated amounts of these substances in the body sensitize the brain to compulsive and uncontrollable cravings for addictive substances in the following manner.
Stress elevates CRF and cortisol in the blood, the natural "feel okay" dopamine system is repressed, the anhedonic individual encounters a drug, which powerfully (if temporarily) relieves this condition, and the brain interprets this relief as the key to survival itself. We are then off to the races.
In the presence of these chronically elevated stress hormones, and lacking cortical coping mechanisms, the dopamine or healthy reward, system is suppressed or broken.
- "Integral Recovery" by John Dupuy
Stress that happens early and stress that is chronic and inescapable is the most harmful. Stress works directly on the midbrain, triggering the release of cortisol and corticotrophin-releasing factor (CRF), both of which are key neurological ingredients in depression and addiction.
As a non-addict, these neurochemicals and hormones will make you susceptible to premature aging and a myriad of other diseases. For an addict, in addition to all of that, elevated amounts of these substances in the body sensitize the brain to compulsive and uncontrollable cravings for addictive substances in the following manner.
Stress elevates CRF and cortisol in the blood, the natural "feel okay" dopamine system is repressed, the anhedonic individual encounters a drug, which powerfully (if temporarily) relieves this condition, and the brain interprets this relief as the key to survival itself. We are then off to the races.
In the presence of these chronically elevated stress hormones, and lacking cortical coping mechanisms, the dopamine or healthy reward, system is suppressed or broken.
- "Integral Recovery" by John Dupuy
Dr. Schwebel’s The Seven Challenges program:
- Challenging Yourself to Make Thoughtful Decisions About Your Life, Including Your Use of Alcohol and Other Drugs
- Challenging Yourself to Look at Your Responsibility and the Responsibility of Others for Your Problems
- Challenging Yourself to Look at What You Like About Alcohol and Other Drugs, and Why You Use Them
- Challenging Yourself to Honestly Look at Your Life, Including Your Use of Alcohol and Other Drugs
- Challenging Yourself to Look at Harm That Has Happened or Could Happen From Your Use of Alcohol and Other Drugs
- Challenging Yourself to Look at Where You Are Headed, Where You Would Like to Go, and What You Would Like to Accomplish
- Challenging Yourself to Take Action and Succeed With Your Decisions About Your Life and Use of Alcohol and Other Drugs
- Think Areté. The Manifesto | by Brian Johnson
Philosophers like Socrates, Plato and Aristotle said that if you want happiness you better live with Areté - a word that literally means virtue or excellence but has a deeper meaning...something closer to “constantly striving to reach your highest potential.”
Think about it. When do we feel most alive? Exactly. When we're being ourselves--our highest selves.
You want happiness? Think Areté. Dream. Grow. Stretch yourself. Dream. Think.
What are you waiting for? Think Areté. Live. Love. Smile. Hug. Laugh. Dream. Do. Create. Have fun. Be intense. Be audacious. Be unreasonable. Act impeccably. Breathe.
Be you. Be different. Get paid to do what you love. Why not? Move the world. Change the world. Push the human race forward.
Whatever you call it, go out and do it.
When? Now. Not when you have enough money or once you do this or do that. That's nonsense.
It's not gonna be easy, but go out and live your dream. Now. You deserve it.
Think Areté.
Think about it. When do we feel most alive? Exactly. When we're being ourselves--our highest selves.
You want happiness? Think Areté. Dream. Grow. Stretch yourself. Dream. Think.
What are you waiting for? Think Areté. Live. Love. Smile. Hug. Laugh. Dream. Do. Create. Have fun. Be intense. Be audacious. Be unreasonable. Act impeccably. Breathe.
Be you. Be different. Get paid to do what you love. Why not? Move the world. Change the world. Push the human race forward.
Whatever you call it, go out and do it.
When? Now. Not when you have enough money or once you do this or do that. That's nonsense.
It's not gonna be easy, but go out and live your dream. Now. You deserve it.
Think Areté.
LET’S DEFINE “LIFE PURPOSE”
“What exactly do I mean by a ‘life purpose’? A purpose is an ultimate concern. It is the final answer to the question Why? Why are you doing this? Why is it important? A purpose is a deeper reason for the immediate goals and motives that drive most daily behavior.
Short-term desires come and go. A young person may desire a good grade on a test, a date to the prom, a cutting edge electronic PlayStation, a starting slot on the basketball team or admission to a prestigious college. These are desires; they reflect immediate aims that may or may not have longer-term significance. A purpose, by contrast, is an end in itself.
A person can change purposes, or add new ones, over the years; but it is in the nature of purposes to endure at least long enough that a serious commitment is made and some progress toward that aim is achieved. A purpose can organize an entire life, imparting not only meaning but also inspiration and motivation for ongoing learning and achievement.”
– William Damon
from The Path to Purpose
Short-term desires come and go. A young person may desire a good grade on a test, a date to the prom, a cutting edge electronic PlayStation, a starting slot on the basketball team or admission to a prestigious college. These are desires; they reflect immediate aims that may or may not have longer-term significance. A purpose, by contrast, is an end in itself.
A person can change purposes, or add new ones, over the years; but it is in the nature of purposes to endure at least long enough that a serious commitment is made and some progress toward that aim is achieved. A purpose can organize an entire life, imparting not only meaning but also inspiration and motivation for ongoing learning and achievement.”
– William Damon
from The Path to Purpose